February…No. March…No.
APRIL whoevenknows, 2020
Captains log 684:
Though word from the capitol of The Contaminate grows increasingly grim,
life here within the compound remains mostly the same, with the only main difference being shortage of our standard supplies.
With the quarantine restricting all other projects within our zone, I had hoped that an increase in time spent near The Creatures could bring about further domestication, however,
much to my surprise,
it seems that these conditions have only made them slip backwards becoming even more feral than when we first began.
They have reverted to howling,
shedding their outward contaminated layers then leaving them as,
I assume, a threat,
and snarling at each other during their feeding times.
The smallest creature is even exhibiting periods of time where her eyes glow green and her head spins a bit, a characteristic we have not witnessed before.
I can only assume lack of decent sun exposure and reduction in socialization has once again shifted their DNA to reveal traits we had yet to discover.
The middle two creatures now must be separated at times to keep them from harming each other. This is a difficult task with limited divided space.
All previous advances in their training and trust are now to be struck from the record, and
started over once more.
This more consistent observation of The Creatures also seems to have brought about appetite excitability, and they are now requiring 2-3 times their normal food intake.
As you can imagine,
I am extremely challenged by how to juggle the increased demand of their feeding schedule and my other important Captain duties such as
Meme Monitoring and
Uniform Decontamination.
Most of this increase in duty is falling on me alone, as my co-captain has been called to manage the
Toilet Paper Distribution Zone even more frequently, and only returns to sleep and help monitor the memes.
My greatest wish is to have more trained and trusted agents also assigned to this station with me.
I long for the days of us sitting around discussing proper procedure in periods of creature mutation, and Co-Captain antidotes.
However,
I fear that goal is many months from being attained.
For now I maintain contact with my trusted allies through the Zoom Porthole,
and I try to spread cheer for increasing their morale.
Each station has its own unique challenge.
I commend each comrade’s dedication to where they have been stationed.
As always, I am committed to this station as long as I remain standing,
and I will fight to do so no matter what goes on outside of this compound’s walls.
For now, I remain intently focused on the porthole,
awaiting any news from the outside.
I bid you all good health,
protection from contamination,
and many many videos of pet and owner reunification for the good of your spirit,
as well.
Captain Green
This article was written by a guest blogger. The opinions expressed here are those of the writer and do not reflect the opinions of Bob Lacey, Sheri Lynch or the Bob & Sheri show.
Mom Outnumbered
Hi! My name is Kerri Green; Wife to Justin, and mother to four highly entertaining daughters -Alena, Chloe, Tessa, and Paige. I am an artist, a writer, a daycare provider, a lover of people, a believer that there is humor and beauty in all things, and the author of Mom Outnumbered; a blog about real family life, and my observations of it. My goal is to make people laugh, to be there for them when they cry, and most importantly, to let them know that they are not at all alone in this up and down world. I live with my family in Sebastopol California, and I am opening the window into our life. So welcome! Come in. Sit down. Just please don’t mind the mysterious wet spots.
