Lessons from a Fourth Grade Field Trip

The following is written by a guest blogger. The opinions expressed here are those of the writer and do not reflect the opinions of Bob Lacey, Sheri Lynch or the Bob & Sheri show.

The sun was still tucked snuggly in bed when I climbed aboard a charter bus with my daughter, Conley, and 50 or so additional fourth graders on an abnormally cold April morning. We were headed three hours north to North Carolina’s state capital, Raleigh.

The children were buzzing with the excitement of their adventure. My fellow chaperones and the teachers were mainlining coffee and saying silent prayers. I had been dreading this day since the moment I let my mama gene override my good sense and volunteered, but as we took our seats, Conley gave me a big hug and said, “I am so glad that you’re going with me, mama. Thank you for being so good to me.” And, at that point I would have walked barefoot on a path of broken glass just to tour the capitol building.

When we arrived at our destination, I was given my itinerary and the names of the children that would be in my care that day. Conley looked the list over and crinkled her nose at one of the names.

“Oh mom, I’m sorry. You got the biggest troublemaker in our class.”

“He doesn’t scare me,” I assured her.

While I wasn’t exactly scared, I certainly didn’t want to deal with the “bad kid”. And, sure enough it didn’t take long until he was in trouble with their teacher for not following a field trip rule. He plopped down on the floor and crossed his little arms tight across his body. He was holding back tears by summoning anger. I understood that move all too well. It’s one I’ve used when I didn’t want my vulnerability to betray me.

I told the other children to go read a display about North Carolina vegetation and I copped a squat beside him on the floor. I saw his shoes.

“I like your Kyrie’s. They look good on you.”

He jerked his head around. His face still scrunched but it had softened a little.

I asked, “Is he your favorite player?

“Uh huh!”

“Well, I think Steph is a better point guard, but Kyrie has much better shoes.”

He gave me a little smile.

“When I was about your age,” I told him, “I was absolutely crazy about the L.A. Lakers. That’s when Magic and Kareem Abdul Jabaar and James Worthy played for them. They called the team ‘Showtime’. Everyone else loved Michael Jordan and the Bulls, but it was always the Lakers for me.”

He nodded with understanding because nowadays everyone else likes Steph Curry or Lebron James, but he was drawn to Kyrie Irving. Then he blurted out, “I don’t have any friends. Everyone hates me.”

I assured him that was not true because I was quite fond of him. I asked him if he would be my friend. He nodded.

We joined back up with the class. My new friend had a couple more outbursts during the day, but we were able to talk them out.

When we got back on the bus, tired and cold, Conley curled up on my lap and was snoring within minutes. I jotted down some of my observations from the day while the one who made me whole slept unbothered on my legs:

• 4:00am is disrespectful.
• Monsters Inc. being played on a bus at 6:00am will charm kids, teachers and chaperones alike.
• Our bus driver’s name was Maurice. I am not sure if I’m proud or disappointed for not telling the kids that some people call him the Space Cowboy while others call him the Gangster of Love.
• Self flushing toilets are wildly entertaining to nine year olds.
• I am certain that there were a lot of interesting things to see at the museums, but all I did was count the children that were in my care. Happy to say, I only lost one.
• If there is a penis drawn on anything, anywhere a nine year old boy will find it and alert all the others.
• The kids gave exactly zero effs about the museums or the capitol building, but hot damn were they pumped about the gift shop.
• If nine year olds had their way, skipping line would be punishable by death.
• I will always be drawn to the misfit kids, but will threaten my kid within an inch of her life if she misbehaves.
• If we immediately quadrupled teachers salaries and gave them quarterly million dollar bonuses, they would still not make enough.
• Sometimes middle age moms are secret sneaker heads.
• Most of the time when people are angry, they just need a friend.
• Just because kids are smaller than adults, it doesn’t mean that they don’t need their feelings validated.
• The day of the field trip was actually an awesome day spent with my favorite person. Days like that are what I used to dream of and it fills me with joy to be able to share them with Conley.

Soshally Awkward

Sosha Lewis is a writer whose work has been featured in The Washington Post, Huffington Post, MUTHA Magazine and The Charlotte Observer. She writes about her sometimes wild, sometimes hilarious, sometimes heartbreaking past filled with free-lunches, a grimy sports bar, a six foot tall Albino woman who tried to save her teenage soul, felonious, drug addicted parents, an imaginary friend named Blueberry and growing up nestled in the coal-dusted mountains of West Virginia.