She had a terrible week.
High school is hard enough without the addition of intimidation and bullying;
Especially from supposed friends that said they loved you and are in all of your pictures.
I’ve sat up with her multiple nights in the recent days as she’s cried, whispering words of comfort, reminding her of who she is as a person, praying my words will sink-in to her trampled ground, and solidify within her;
Be at least one thing she can truly believe in.
Chloe isn’t perfect.
She’s in the middle of fifteen, and she’s made a few mistakes getting to it,
but she works on herself diligently, and she owns her own wrongs. She falls down, and she stands up again.
I’ve told her a person can only do so much apologizing for things they once did.
After that, whether to forgive or to hold onto pain and let it fester into bitterness has to be a thing that the other person involved chooses.
I’ve lifted her chin,
I’ve said, “Look at me for a minute, OK?”
I’ve talked about healing and what we can learn from our own bruises.
I got a necklace for her this week from Landon Lacey Jewelry.
I knew it was meant for her the moment I saw it.
Its delicate chain and single dark pearl reminded me of everything that she is.
Rare, one that stands out from the average,
deeper in hue than most floating in the oceans around her.
I surprised her with it.
“A token of my love for you,” I said.
Something she can wear and touch and remember exactly whose she is.
I hope that all of the words I’ve said at her bedside somehow stay with it, worn around her neck;
Adorned with them.
I hope she feels a piece of me right there with her always.
I watched her put it on as she looked in the mirror, tears still drying on her cheeks.
I saw her smiling at her own reflection ever so slightly, unaware I was watching it and how the light hit her.
She lifted her chin slightly to elongate her neck as she examined, and I thought,
“Yes, beautiful girl, you lift up your head, and just keep right on doing it.”
I watched her and prayed that all of the other things I’ve spent my life decorating her with would somehow hold her up, standing tall where she belongs, rooted.
I have draped her in faith in her own abilities,
I have taught her to listen to her own voice and what it’s saying, even when other voices threaten to drown it.
I have placed on her reminders of a home and a family that will always be her safety.
I have fastened on, “You can do and be anything.”
To anyone that comes against her and threatens to try to tear those truths off of her,
I write this as a mother who stands with her in every flame.
I write this because I believe we are the beauty born from what used to be ashes.
Teen Girl
Mean Girl
Squint your eyes and say, “I’ve SEEN” girl
You have not seen anything
Teen Boy
Mean Boy
Loom over and threaten boy
Your pain prompts you to destroy everything
Lean Girl
Feeling Unseen Girl
Backed up against a wall girl
Apologizing for everything
Bully Boy
Unruly Boy
Towering over people in a C Boy
I feel sorry for how the pain in you breaks everything
Burning Girl
Hurting Boy
Watch
Her
Lift
Her
Chin
The Phoenix,
Alone
Rises from everything
Mom Outnumbered
Hi! My name is Kerri Green; Wife to Justin, and mother to four highly entertaining daughters -Alena, Chloe, Tessa, and Paige. I am an artist, a writer, a daycare provider, a lover of people, a believer that there is humor and beauty in all things, and the author of Mom Outnumbered; a blog about real family life, and my observations of it. My goal is to make people laugh, to be there for them when they cry, and most importantly, to let them know that they are not at all alone in this up and down world. I live with my family in Sebastopol California, and I am opening the window into our life. So welcome! Come in. Sit down. Just please don’t mind the mysterious wet spots.
