Thirty years is a long time. It is also how long I will have been married to my husband as of October 16. I’m optimistic we will make it to 30, but one never knows.
I struggle to believe I have spent more than half of my life with this one person. Some days it feels like we just got married. Other days, I’m like, “Oh, you are still here.” Every day, I love him—if for no other reason than there is not another human on this planet who could put up with my shit for this long. I’m difficult. I know that. He’s not always a walk in the park, but I’m the one who is high-maintenance in this relationship.
We got married very young and a lot of folks didn’t think it would last. It still may not. Nevertheless, 30 years is an accomplishment, especially when you consider I still enjoy his company. He makes me laugh every day. That is the real secret to a long marriage.
When we got married, I was in my last year of college and Brett had just graduated and joined the Army. I had a professor at the time who went to my bestie and begged her to talk some sense into me and not marry this man. I’m paraphrasing, but I believe she told my friend it would be “the worst mistake of my life.” This angered me greatly. I did not call off the wedding. And believe me, I have made way worse mistakes.
I spoke about this with another professor. He laughed and said, “You two are great for each other. You will be fine.” He then bought us a Tater Twister as a wedding gift. To this day, I never eat a curly fry without thinking of Dale.
We stayed in contact with Dale until he passed away several years ago. I was devastated when we lost him. I’m so grateful he got to meet our daughter when she was little. They hit it off in a big way. I miss Dale almost every day. The last time we saw him, he told us how much he loved us as a couple and Josie completed us.
Over the years my college friends and I have talked about the teacher who hexed my marriage. Admittedly, Brett was a bit of a train wreck in college, but he really got his shit together and turned out pretty well. He has been successful in his career and is a great husband and father.
I’m not going to lie. I would freak out if Josie told me she was getting married at 21. It’s too young, yet here I am. I wouldn’t change any of it. From my hippie wedding to moving all over the world with this man. It’s been a hell of a ride.
Brett and I were best friends for a couple of years before we dated. He actually fixed me up with the guy I dated before him. I know, weird.
Taking the leap into dating was difficult. I knew a lot about him—good and bad. I also treasured his friendship. He is a really good friend. However, I think the main thing that held me back was, I knew. I knew deep down in my heart if I went out with him, I was done. He would be the last person I ever dated, kissed and all the other stuff. He was.
Even if I kick his ass to the curb tomorrow, there will never be another. I’m done. He is my loon. We have mated for life. And again, no one else in the world could put up with my level of crazy.