Outside My Comfort Zone

News flash: I’m an anxious person. I battle my anxiety daily. This struggle oftentimes keeps me from doing things—things I would probably enjoy. However, there are certain opportunities that present themselves which make me put on my big girl panties, pop a Xanax and soldier the fuck on. Good friends are at the top of that list—and the opportunity to see Brandi Carlile live.

This opportunity arose just a couple of days before the show. A dear friend texted me that she had an extra ticket for P!nk in Cincinnati. I started shaking. I knew Brandi was her opener. I gave myself a serious talking to and convinced myself I could do this. I HAD to do this. I told her I was in!

I then took to compiling a list of worries in my head, most of which involved time. Weather, sleep, food, peeing too often and heights were also part of my list. I know many people would assume being in a space with 40,000 other people would be my biggest stressor. That certainly did make me uneasy, but time was my greater concern. I’m a lunatic about time. Luckily my friend was super accommodating and everything went smoothly. This is what a good friend looks like, y’all. We arrived early, had time to procure merch, food and wine—the essentials. My friend even bought me pizza while I stood in line for a Brandi shirt. She is the real rock star here.

I would also like to thank the guy at the wine stand. It was a 15-dollar glass of wine, but that dude filled my glass to the brim and it was a big glass. I had to chug some of it to just be able to walk away. Best 15-dollar glass of red I have ever had.

I have seen a lot of concerts in my time, but I have never attended what I would call a spectacle. By that I mean an absolutely massive crowd, performers flying through the air, backup dancers and fireworks. I’ve been to big venues, but all indoors—never an outside stadium holding this much humanity. This is what you get when you have my girl, Brandi opening for P!nk.

I have always liked P!nk. I think she is an incredibly talented performer. She is gorgeous and funny. She has a great message. But, let me be totally clear, this woman is not human. There is no way she can be the same species as me. There were things she did during her performance that made me physically ill. I’m terrified of heights. She is apparently part bird. Humans are not meant to fly around stadiums whilst flipping about and singing. P!nk did it all. I went to the show for Brandi, but I left a much bigger P!nk fan.

Okay, back to Brandi. She was amazing—everything I hoped for and more. Her set list was almost perfect. She did not play my favorite song, but it is an old, somewhat obscure ditty, so I will give her a pass. She did do an incredible cover of Radiohead’s Creep and fucking nailed it. Brandi’s voice is one of my safe places. It never fails to move me and leave me in awe. I have loved her for years. She is also an incredible human and a fantastic role model. So help me god, if I find out she eats puppies or some shit, I will need to be institutionalized.

The real highlight of the evening came when P!nk decided to pay tribute to Sinead O’Connor who passed away earlier that day. As soon as she started talking about Sinead I began crying. She was one more thing from my youth that was now gone. What came next left me in a total puddle. P!nk brought Brandi back out to the stage and the two of them performed a gut-wrenching, heartfelt and epically beautiful version of Nothing Compares 2 U. It was a moment I will never forget. I love every version of this song. It is perfect no matter the performer. If you have not seen Chris Cornell sing it acoustically accompanied by a cello, Google that shit.

Despite all my extreme anxiety, the night could not have been more perfect. Everything went as planned. For nearly four hours I was transported out of my hamster wheel mind to a perfect, hot summer night with 40,000 of my closest friends, just living in the moment—something I’m very rarely able to do.

Stepping outside your comfort zone is hard. Sometimes it ends in absolute disaster. Then there are those moments where you are in great company, enjoying something you love and you realize for a few fleeting moments what it must be like to be normal.

Angela Traver

What is this blog about? Well, it's a general blog, but it is also a very specific blog. If you get that reference, you get a gold star! I have been a public relations professional and writer of press releases for more than 20 years—primarily in the booze biz. I decided to do some writing for fun and embrace the humor that gets me through most days. Hopefully it will make you chuckle—or at least smile. I’m a certified crazy magnet, and more than a little nutty myself, so buckle up. Also, I have two vices—profanity and red wine/whiskey. You’ve been warned. It should also be noted, that I’m a HUGE Bob & Sheri fan. I’ve been a listener for more than 20 years. This opportunity is a dream come true and it may have made me cry. That being said, I cry at everything. If you are into booze, dogs, food and/or knitting, hit me up on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter (although I’m terrible at Twitter and it scares me) @kyspiritsgal. You can also find all my previous blog posts at www.kyspiritsgal.com.